Finding love in the golden years
By Judy Tracy of Hector
Marty and his wife both graduated from Eden Prairie High School and were both well acquainted with the metro area, but they had made a joint decision. When they retired they would move to a small town in rural America. They found that cute little small town -- it was Hector, Minnesota. But things didn’t go exactly to plan. Shortly after their move, Marty’s wife died suddenly. There was hardly enough time to get acquainted with their new home.
Life changed for Marty. His new neighbors were very helpful, bringing food and just being “Minnesota Nice.” Their concern led them to suggest that he could try a program that was available in Hector. It was called Senior Meals. Here he would get good food and meet some nice people. He wasn’t especially interested, but decided to give it a try. Here he found some very nice senior citizens.
As time went by, being only in his 60s, Marty didn’t want to spend the rest of his life alone. So he did what Marty had always done when making an important decision. He prayed. He prayed that God would send him a Christian woman, hopefully reasonably healthy, to spend the rest of his life with.
At Senior Meals he got acquainted with a woman who seemed to fit those requirements. After doing some investigation he was told that she was certainly a Christian woman, who was very involved in her church, and then he discovered she must be physically fit, since she was leading an exercise class for seniors. Could this be the partner he had asked God for?!
Being a “walker,” Marty walked to Senior Meals every day, whether the temperature was 95 degrees above zero or 25 degrees below zero. It was a very cold winter day. Marty had walked to Senior Meals. Being the kind person she was, she offered to give him a ride home, out of the cold Minnesota winter. After a few discussions about the weather, Marty suggested that he had coupons to a restaurant in Hutchinson. Would she care to join him? She said, “Yes, I love to go out to eat.”
That’s where I come into this story. I talked to my friends about this invitation and their time together. The rest of the story will be told in Judy’s words...
“I didn’t know what to wear and what to talk about. I haven’t been on a date in 30 years. Could this be called a date? The evening went great. We talked for hours and enjoyed our “first date” very much! We both continued attending “Senior Dining” regularly. It was a place to get to know more about each other.
We did discover that we both liked to attend high school basketball games. I went with my daughter, who was a teacher at the high school. She went to support her students and I loved spending time with her. Marty is a sports fan, so going to these games was very enjoyable for him. He spotted me and came to sit by me and my daughter. We continue to attend these events regularly after our marriage.
This is where our first challenge began. I have two children, three grandchildren and nine great grandchildren. Marty has five children and 12 grandchildren. And all of them are very protective of their parents. They watched us closely, not knowing what to expect of these two senior parents. We did begin attending family holidays together, without expecting them to be as happy with our new relationship as we were.
Time seemed to fly by, with us spending more and more time together, getting to know and love each other. Marty began saying, “I want to marry you!” I said, “You haven’t asked me!” He did what men of his era do. He got on his knees and asked me to marry him. I said “Yes!” It’s time to plan a wedding. Since we attend separate churches, we asked both of our pastors to be a part of our marriage ceremony. They both agreed. I guess we will be “double married!”
We chose June 6, 2015, with the ceremony being held in my backyard. We wanted our families to be a big part of the ceremony. Marty’s son was his best man and my daughter was my maid of honor. Our other family members took other significant part in the ceremony.
Since we met at Senior Meals, we asked the cook from that program to prepare a catered meal. She said, “Yes, I would love to be a part of your love story.” We went on a honeymoon trip to Branson and began our life together.
Next challenge ... We both owned fairly nice homes. Which one will we live in? After praying about it, we decided to choose my home, so we needed to sell Marty’s home. We did what we were both accustomed to when deciding on a big decision -- we held hands and prayed. Within 10 minutes we received a phone call. It was my sister. After a minute of talking I said, “Marty, are you selling your home? My sister wants to move to Hector.” God is great, all the time! Marty’s house was sold immediately and we began plans to build him a large shed on what had previously been Judy’s home and was now “Our Home Together!”
Our life together has been filled with much happiness. We are both quite healthy, with a few bumps in the road, so we are able to spend retirement doing what we both enjoy. Most of our time is spent in our churches and with our family activities. We now share leadership of a Bible study, several times a month, with other “faith-filled Christians!”
We have been blessed financially, with funds from successful investments and pensions from former occupations. We take turns paying for monthly expenses, share laundry and meal preparations (with lots of eating out!), AND we can keep very active spending time volunteering with Meals on Wheels, Back the Pack program, visiting local nursing homes, and bringing food to shut-ins and children in our neighborhood. We spend lots of time attending area celebrations, community theaters, musical presentations and whatever looks like fun.
We no longer enjoy driving long distances ourselves, so we now do lots of bus trips, getting to see lots of delightful parts of our country and getting to know some delightful seniors along the way.
Marty taught me to cast a fish line. I taught Marty how to care for my yard, with many beautiful flowers. The flower gardens grew into vegetable gardening, in our local “community garden.” We aren’t afraid to try something new. Neither of us had ever canned, but that is our next project together ... canning cucumbers and beets that we raise in our vegetable garden.
Seniors can fall in love and enjoy many joyful experiences together. We are proof of that!”